Humor Is The Best, Forget The Rest !

Nov. 29, 2009 - PRLog -- Terrorism, wars, swine flu, climatic problems, AIDS, economic crisis, crumbling medical and hospital services, hunger, malaria, draught and water problem, world-wide corruption;
misunderstood and misapplied religions; alcoholism, narcomany, mental disorders, diseases; traffic accidents, air, water, land pollution; unemployment;  street crimes;
political turmoils; racism, the approaching Marduk and the frightening scenarios of 2012 and thousand  and one more world problems are opressing the mankind in his plight of so-called "progress in civilisation". One often wonders, "Are we in progress or regression" ? Did the earlier people really have it worse than us?

In this multitude of problems surrounding us, humor comes to our salvation :

Two Black Sea Turks decide to have a change in their way of living and after forty years of fishing, decide to start a chicken farm.
They buy 500 chicks and plant them by their feet in the soil, on the newly acquired farm.
They water them with the hope that they will soon grow into full size chickens, hens and roosters, so they can be sold for a good profit. Poor things die after a day.
The two partners think, they are inexperienced in this business and must try again. This time, they buy 500 chick and plant them by their heads into the soil and water them. The chicks die immediately.
They write a letter to the local university, Department of Agriculture and ask what wrong they are doing in their new enterprise. the university's dept. of agriculture answers them after a month: "Send us a sample of the soil and we can analyze it in our laboratory and tell you what is wrong with it.!
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An American family of four sit in an hamburger restaurant in Moscow, during the communist times. Hamburgers are excellent, juicy, fresh and very tasty. They order another round. But, this time the son of the family complains that he can not bite the hamburger, as it is so hard. They call the waiter. After the waiter inspects the hamburger, he says : "Sorry friends! I'll change this and bring you a new one. They have forgotten in this a microphone!"
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How about the Italian man who is selling tickets to the car owners parking around the Tower of Pisa?
"It says free parking" protests a tourist, "What ticket?"
"This is not for parking" explains the attendant, "this is an insurance ticket. I am only selling it on that side of the Pisa Tower, in case the tower collapses on your car!'
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An Italian walks into a small bank in New York and asks the manager  if he may borrow 5000 dollars as he needs it urgently for his business trip to Italy for two week.
"Yes, indeed you can" answers the manager proudly, "if you can show a collateral."
"Well" says the Italian, "Would you accept my Ferrari as a collateral? It is parked right in front of the bank."
"Yes, we can" answers the manager, a little surprised with a 250.000 dollar collateral for
a 5000 dollar loan. Papers are exchanged, the loan agreement is signed. " You have to pay 23 dollars interest for two weeks" explains the manager and hands out the 5000 dollars and adds: "We'll put your car into our special parking, underneath the building, it will be quite safe.
After two weeks, the Italian returns from his business trip, pays back the 5000 dollars plus 23 dollars interest and gets his car.
"Sir" inquires the manager, "While you were away, we made a check on you. You are a multimillionaire and have accounts in top banks. You could borrow money from any of these banks. Why did you choose our bank?"
"How else could I park my car for two weeks in New york,  for 23 dollars and expect to find it where I parked after my return:" answers the Italian.
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I know you want more humor now: Try these excellent humorous books>

WISDOM IN SMILE by Askin Ozcan  -  ISBN 142577153X   (Xlibris)
www.xlibris.com/WisdomInSmile.html

THE SECOND  VENICE  by Askin Ozcan  - ISBN 1598000888  (Outskirts Press)
http://www.outskirtspress.com/thesecondvenice

http://www.prlog.org/10348387.html

These unique humorous masterpieces are available  on 200 internet bookshops or from their publishers or from 25.000 bookstores by giving their ISBN.

Look under the author's name  at www.amazon.com, www.bn.com, www.ibs.it, www.adlibris.it, www.fishpond.com.au, www.infibeam.com, www.flipkart.com or your favorite internet bookshop.

Global distribution by www.ingrambook.com

Authors web/page:   www.xlibris.com/AskinOzcan.html

Author Askin Ozcan is looking for publishers world -wide to publish his boks in the local languages. He owns the copyright of his books.

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Author. Has six published titles in the U.S.A. Also many articles published internationally. Currently writer/ mentor at www.thesop.org and writes also for www.newsblaze.com, www.americanchronicle.com, www.theseoultimes.com