Ten Optimistic Fixes for Everyday Common Pet Peeves

Oct. 7, 2010 - PRLog -- Dr. Russ Buss writes about the "Optimistic Fix" for ten common pet peeves that  can bring on a down mood on an otherwise "Blue Sky Day."  With these "Optimistic Fixes" he shows how to keep the "sky blue" and the "day bright!"  

Ten Optimistic Fixes for 10 Common Pet Peeves

1. Peeve: A salesperson that pressures me might get me to buy something I don’t want and is wasting my time.

   * Optimistic Fix:  I only need to remind myself that nobody else wastes my time except me and that I am the one who buys not the salesperson.

2. Peeve: Junk mail piles up on my desk because I think something of value might be in there.

   * Optimistic Fix: Set priorities and make some tough or not so tough choices.   Quickly go through the junk pile and discard anything that you are not going to use today.  Worried about contributing to paper pollution, then create a recycle bin.

3. Peeve: Unsolicited phone calls.

   * Optimistic Fix:  Take control of what I can control.  For example: Let the call roll to the answering machine/voice mail; really organize your contact list on the cell phone so you know you do not have to take any callers not identifiable.

4. Peeve: Standing in line at the grocery store is boring and a waste of time

   * Optimistic Fix:  Making a behavior change by going to the store at a non-busy time is one option.  But, if you find yourself stuck in line, it is time to learn and practice how to pass the time meaningfully, if not productively.  Think about some problem that needs to be solved and brainstorming ideas to yourself: use the back of the grocery list to write them down and you will find yourself amazingly pleased with the new ideas and approach to the problem.

5. Peeve: Internet service going down.

   * Optimistic Fix:  Optimists are flexible and enjoy the opportunity to practice flexibility.  So here is a chance to either find another way to access the internet or to spend the day doing a something different than originally planned.

6. Peeve: People who don’t do what they said they would do making me unable to get my stuff done and having to wait for them.

   * Optimistic Fix: Optimists collaborate and build relationships and herein lies a challenge and opportunity to build and practice interpersonal relationship skills.  Try finding a positive communication approach to influencing the others to get their stuff done in a timely manner.

7. Peeve: People who leave their windshield wipers running on high when the rain has stopped until I am finally forced to say “STOP!”

   * Optimistic Fix: Optimists enjoy the challenge of finding a positive way to communicate about a negative situation.  The running windshield wipers present an opportunity to practice positive approaches to sending the “STOP” message.  These examples focusing on helping the listener become self-aware with a little humor.  Try saying:  “The swish swish of the windshield wipers is making me sleepy;” “The tic tock of the wipers sounds like a  coo-koo  clock.”

8. Peeve: People who don’t read or listen to clear and well distributed public announcements and then ask me to repeat the information.  I think they are wasting my time and should be more self-sufficient.

   * Optimistic Fix: Optimists enjoy the opportunity to teach others to be self-sufficient.  Say to the individual:  “I want to give you the right information. Let’s take a look at the printed announcement.”  Then ask them to look at it and ask if they have any questions.

9. Peeve: Klutz moves like banging my head on something, spilling a latte on my lap or walking nose first into the glass of a revolving door causing pain, embarrassment, and self-derogation.

   * Optimistic Fix:  Optimists learn to find humor in the pains of life, laugh at themselves, play the clown to cover up any embarrassment, and then praise themselves for getting the fun out of a downer.

10. Peeve: People who don’t pick up on obvious non-verbal cues causing me to have to be rude or keep walking backward to maintain a comfortable space between us.

   * Optimistic Fix:  Optimists know it is their choice to be rude or to find a clever and self-pleasing way of communicating positively.  They enjoy the act of finding a novel solution to this kind of problem.  For example, to find that comfortable interpersonal space, they can change the non-verbal dynamics by saying, “let’s sit down over here,” or turn sideways to the person.  Alternatively, they can think about how other cultures like to have a narrow interpersonal space gap and say to themselves, “I’ll just stop backing up and see where the other person stops, and see if I can tolerate that much physical closeness."

For even more OPTIMISM: Click on http://www.drrussbuss.com

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