Dating After Divorce - Accepting

Jan. 27, 2016 - PRLog -- By Kenneth Stepp

Accepting what is…. Well, that’s the theme I am writing about. I wish I could say I was good at it. I’m just not. I have known people that at least on the outside, looked much better at it than myself. Perhaps I ask too many questions. Why am I still alone? Why wasn’t all I had enough? Why isn’t love enough? Then come the what if things. What if our timing had been better? What if I hadn’t said that? What if, what if, what if. Two words when said together are completely useless. Yet I still try to understand them. What if indeed…..

“But what if you're wrong?

What if there's more?

What if there's hope you never dreamed of hoping for?

What if you jump?

And just close your eyes?

What if the arms that catch you, catch you by surprise?

What if I’m more than enough?

What if it's love?”

― Nichole Nordeman (edited)

What if it’s love? Now there’s the question we all want to ask. That is until we reach what some call maturity. Then we think about it, but hide as best we can from it. What if we are actually hiding from what suppose to be our future? What will our future look like without it? There are days when I wonder the same thing. I know I’m afraid of what will happen if I stop hiding from love. You see, I’m afraid that what has always happen will happen again. It is paralyzing.

“You’re worried about what-ifs. Well, what if you stopped worrying?”

― Shannon Celeb

Is it as simple as that? Can we just stop worrying about what ifs? Is that even possible? I remember when I was a young man. I feared nothing. My life has painted my past that way. Fearless and fierce. I didn’t just run after life. I tackled it and made it surrender. Today. I am much wiser, slower, and I feel even smarter. But I enjoyed that old life. There were no boundaries I could not knock down. Now, I don’t even try. It makes me wonder what the big deal was to get to this point in life. I’m healthy and happy. But deep down living in fear of losing something I know I want badly. Love….

“We could have been the greatest love story ever told.

If only you'd stayed in character.”

― Joseph Gordon-Levitt

Wow. Do I love that quote. Staying in character. Wouldn’t life be awesome with a script? Maybe that’s what’s missing in my life. At any rate. I know something is. Is there someone out there looking for me like I look for her? Do I already know her? Is she as scared as I am? More questions, less answers. The story of my life.

“But that's the thing with the what-if game-- you really can never know the answer to the question. And maybe it's better that way.”

― Elizabeth Eulberg, Better off Friends